Hello lovelies! My name is Tori and welcome to my new little blog. Things are still in the works to create this new hobby of mine, so please bear with me while I get adjusted! I’m a 20 year old college student just trying to find her way in life. I enjoy things like reading a good book, taking walks, listening to music that touches my soul and binge watching netflix. I was diagnosed with panic disorder two years go and would love to share my story. My goal for this little corner of the internet is to fill it with all kinds of positive vibes. I am on a journey to love and accept myself the way I am. I would love if you came along for the ride.
Anxiety. It’s an easy word to type but a much harder word to feel. How do you wrap up all that anxiety is into a sequence of letters expertly weaved together? You don’t because it’s not something people like to talk about. Anxiety isn’t pretty, it’s not romantic, and it is most definitely not something easily understood. The word usually goes hidden, in an effort not to be mentioned or it’s said freely but not taken seriously. But why? Why is having anxiety something to hide and why does society tell you to be ashamed of it? Why do I feel like I have to cower in a corner anytime someone has the nerve to question it? As if it’s my own fault for feeling my heart pulse uncontrollably. And why am I considered “different” when all I am really doing is seeing the world differently than you? Listen, anxiety and any other kind of mental illness has its challenges. Ask anyone who deals with it. I am constantly on edge and always on the lookout for a threat that doesn’t exist. My heart beats entirely too fast and I often get exhausted extremely easily. I always have a big cloud of doubt over my head that rains negativity. Living with something like this is NOT easy. It’s scary and you constantly feel like you’re out of sorts. But contrary to popular belief, most of us are not feeling this way to get attention. I know I know hard to believe. Here me out though. Anxiety is paralyzing, it keeps you from living a relatively normal life. Most of us don’t want to feel that way so why would we use the irrational thoughts, the effects on our family/friends, and sometimes the inability to even get out of bed to gain attention? No thanks. Even though it can be a negative experience, anxiety can actually have some really positive outcomes. I am way more compassionate towards people struggling with mental illness than before I was diagnosed. Actually, I feel more compassionate towards people in general. I have had to learn a lot about myself and one of those things is that I learned to love myself. That took me an absurdly long time but I promise you, it is incredibly worth it when you get there. I’ll talk more about that in another post soon! My body is always prepared to protect itself, I’m like a secret ninja. Side note: Everyone who struggles with anxiety struggles with it differently. Some of the things I have described above will not apply to everyone. The main point I am trying to make is that mental illness can be a rough journey. If you know someone who has battled with this, be kind. Love them and accept them for who they are!
Hello lovelies, welcome back to my second installment of music Monday’s for the anxious soul! Down in the Valley is one of those songs that can instantly take me to a different place. It didn’t matter what was bothering me, turning on this song has helped me to relax and breathe a little easier. I love the strum of the guitar and the harmony of the voices together. Enjoy!
If you want to check out more of their music, click the links below!
Music has always been one of the most helpful tools in coping with my anxiety. When I first started going to counseling, my counselor suggested I make a playlist of my most favorite calming songs. That playlist helped me through some of the darkest times in my life. I use it whenever I need to calm down from having an anxiety attack or when I am having trouble falling asleep. Every Monday I will link a calming song with an explanation as to why it has been helpful to me. My goal is to help any of those that need a song to comfort their anxious soul. Sit back, relax and enjoy!
The Backpack Song by Bear Attack
Created on Canva/by Tori Turner
This song has been one of the most helpful/calming songs I’ve listened to. When I first found it, it was on repeat for months! You may recognize it from shows like Pretty Little Liars or The Vampire Diaries (both my favs!) It’s a very soft and mellow track. This was my go to song to play when I came home from school stressed out or anxious. It’s still one of my absolute favorite songs. It’s perfect for those cold and rainy days or just because you’re missing someone. Hope you like it!
If you want to check out more of their music, click the links below!
The lonely sparrow 